


These Things I'll Never Say

by nommonkeypie (Tessa_Harrison)



Category: Block B
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-07
Updated: 2016-06-07
Packaged: 2018-07-13 00:19:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7130555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tessa_Harrison/pseuds/nommonkeypie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Instead, all it did was make Jihoon feel sick.</p>
<p>Well, sicker.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Jihoon

His head was killing him. The smell of vomit was strong and it made him feel sick. Again apparently. He was on his side though so that was good. It didn’t smell like he’d thrown up on his bed but the stench was in the air. He wasn’t looking forward to cleaning up that mess later.

He closed his eyes. Maybe if he slept, this hangover would magically go away. Even when the door opened, he kept his eyes closed. No doubt it was one of his hyungs coming to make his life that much more miserable.

It was only when the bed shifted that Jihoon opened his eyes. He was but wasn’t surprised to see Taeil. He knew their oldest had a soft spot for him and to be honest, Jihoon knew he had a soft spot for this hyung in particular. Taeil was just so little and cute. Who could resist him?

But Taeil was the last person he wanted to see right now.

“That was stupid,” Taeil scolded even as he took a damp rag and started wiping Jihoon’s face. It was a comforting gesture, one that should have made him feel better. Instead, all it did was make Jihoon feel sick.

Well, sicker.

Jihoon groaned, trying to keep from throwing up on Taeil. That really wasn’t how either of them wanted to start the day.

“Drank too much,” he admitted.

Taeil laughed. “No shit, your friends had to drag your drunk ass here last night.”

Jihoon could vaguely remember something that seemed similar to that. He closed his eyes again. Flashes of the night before seemed to come. They’ve been at a bar, not that that was anything new. Someone was laughing and it had made him feel pissed off but for the life of him, Jihoon couldn’t remember why.

“You’re in luck,” Taeil continued. Jihoon really wished his hyung would stop talking. He usually enjoyed listening to Taeil. After all, his hyung had the voice of an angel. Of course, usually every little sound didn’t make Jihoon’s head feel as if it were about to explode.

“I’m feeling generous today. Kyung said we should just leave you to suffer.”

Kyung had the right idea. Why couldn’t Taeil listen to Kyung?

Fingers brushed his bangs back from his forehead. Jihoon’s eyes flew open in surprise. And immediately, he hissed in pain from the light. It was entirely too bright for his poor eyes at the moment.

Why had he gotten so drunk again?

Song Minho’s laughter filled his head. They’d gone somewhere new, a place that some coordi-noona had suggested to Minho. 

The bed shifted again as Taeil stood up. As much as Jihoon didn’t want his hyung to go, he was also more than a little relieved. There was something about Taeil that made Jihoon feel sick in the pit of his stomach.

“I’ll check on you in a bit,” Taeil promised as he stood in the doorway. Which left Jihoon alone with his thoughts. He wasn’t sure if that was better or worse.

Minho’s voice was in his head again.

“Checking your messages again?” The voice teased.

Why had he been checking his phone again?

“Your hyung isn’t going to call.”

With his eyes closed, Jihoon felt like he was back in the bar. A G-Dragon song had been playing (Minho had made some comment about that). The place was full of the smells of alcohol, perfume, and cologne. He felt like he’d see Minho if he turned his head and looked.

And now he remembered why he’d drank so much. It was Taeil. Everything always seemed to lead back to the guy. He’d been waiting for a message, so something (anything really) from Taeil. He couldn’t remember why it had seemed so important last night but it had. And it was frustration because he couldn’t remember. Not even looking at his phone helped. There was nothing new or special or different that would explain why he’d apparently tried to kill his liver last night.

Taeil appeared in the doorway, cup in hand. “Hangover cure,” he explained, walking over to Jihoon.

Drinking meant sitting up. That thought of that made Jihoon’s head want to spin. Taeil seemed to understand this because his hyung sighed. Setting the cup on Jihoon’s desk, Taeil came over and physically hauled Jihoon so that he was sitting up. Sometimes it was easy to forget just how strong the guy was. Again, it went back to the whole small and cute thing.

‘Why…” Jihoon made a face as he realized just how dry his throat was and just how painful talking was. Taeil grabbed the cup and handed it over. He took a drink. It wasn’t the best tasting thing he’d ever had but Jihoon knew better than to complain. “Hyung, why are you being so nice?” He had to know why.

Taeil shrugged. “I just felt like it.”

Well that was a scary answer.

Jihoon looked from his hyung to the cup and back. “I didn’t throw up on you, did I?” He asked, unable to hide the horror in his voice.

Taeil chuckled. “No. You almost got Kyung though.”

Okay, still bad but better. Kyung wasn’t as scary as Taeil. At least, not a pissed off Taeil. Kyung could still be scary at times and Jihoon realized he was going to be on the receiving end of a prank sometime in the future. He could live with that.

Taeil sat back down on the bed. He didn’t say anything and neither did Jihoon. Instead, he chose to sip from the cup Taeil had brought. He noticed the odd taste less and less the more he drank.

It was this sort of situation that had caused him to drink so much though.

Years ago, he’d have laughed at the idea of having a crush on Taeil. That the idea of even just sitting next to his hyung have his heart racing. And leaving him feeling sick to his stomach. That last one was probably just the hangover speaking.

“When do you meet with that real estate agent?” Taeil’s voice broke the quiet. And that right there was the reason.

He’d mentioned moving out. He hadn’t meant it. Jihoon knew tests were stupid and that’s exactly what that whole thing had been. He felt even more stupid admitting it. So he didn’t.

“Next week,” he answered. Hopefully the misery he felt wasn’t obvious in his voice. It wasn’t a lie though. He really had set up a meeting. His hyungs were too likely to call him on a bluff and he’d needed it to look real. Apparently it looked too real because no one was trying to stop Jihoon. And the fact that Taeil was so accepting hurt the most.

Taeil whistled. “That’s soon.”

Jihoon nodded. “Yeah. It was either now or have to wait a couple of months.” And his stupid brain had wanted action now. Had he been drunk when he’d thought of this? At times, it felt like he had been.

“It’ll be weird not having you around all the time.” Taeil gave a little laugh. “But it’ll be good for you,” he finished. Jihoon’s heart sank to the pit of his stomach. It didn’t make the queasy feeling any better because they were kind words. If they had come from any other hyung, Jihoon would have been happy to hear them. From Taeil, well, they stung. And he knew they shouldn’t but somehow that only made it worse.

“You got quiet,” Taeil teased, poking Jihoon’s side.

“I’ve got a hangover,” Jihoon whined back. It wasn’t why he’d been quiet, at least, not the full reason but he couldn’t say that. Not to Taeil or anyone else.


	2. Taeil

He hadn’t expected that the dorm would feel so empty. That it would seem so quiet. It had never felt like this before but then, they had always had Jihoon. When the other three had left (well, it was really more like 2.5 because Jiho still came around occasionally), it hadn’t really changed anything other than letting the remaining members have more room. And less of a fight over who got the washroom.

It didn’t help that it seemed like everywhere Taeil looked, Jihoon was having a fun time. One that was better. The guy was out on what felt like a nightly basis, always with his friends and always smiling and laughing. He was a different Jihoon with them and that was the part that got to Taeil the most.

Even Jihoon’s smile seemed different now. And yes, he knew they still had their schedules and their maknae was still their maknae. Jihoon was still the one who made everyone more comfortable. The boy was a big goof and yes, he might be annoying at times and his playfulness got out of hand at times but...it was hard to explain.

Again, the dorm was too quiet.

Kyung was off doing something. Taeil hadn’t asked. Jaehyo was in his room, the door shut. Taeil really didn’t feel like asking about that. Moments like this made him miss Jihoon even more. At this point, Taeil almost wished they had something in the morning. The day off was nice and he knew they definitely all appreciated it but if they had something, well, it would have given him a chance to see Jihoon without coming up with weird excuses. Not that he missed the kid or anything.

That was a lie. He did.

The fact that he missed Jihoon ticked Taeil off. There was no rational reason for him to feel this way. And it seemed like everywhere he turned, there were more and more reminders that Jihoon was moving on. That Jihoon had a life of his own, one that didn’t include Taeil except when they had some sort of group event.

Dammit. He knew what this was. Jealousy. Which made no damn sense. He knew he shouldn’t be jealous. They all had their own lives and Jihoon had always had his friends. But now with Jihoon on his own, it seemed like those friends were becoming more and more a part of Jihoon’s life. And Taeil was less and less.

If he could go back in time, to when Jihoon was talking about moving out, he would. He wanted to at least but somehow he just knew it would turn out just the same. He’d play the role of the supportive hyung who would help Jihoon. He wouldn’t say what he really wanted to say. There would be no asking Jihoon to stay or anything else.

He tossed his phone onto his bed. If he kept looking at it, he’d do something he’d regret. He left his room, knowing distance was the only thing that would keep him from doing something stupid like call Jihoon and say things he knew he shouldn’t say. At best, it would just make things awkward and no matter what, he was sure he would lose the closeness they had. It might be silly but those little moments when he had all of Jihoon’s attention (even if it was something as ridiculous as the guy trying to grab at Taeil’s chest) were the moments that made Taeil’s day that much better. He wouldn’t do anything that might cause Jihoon to stop even if that meant Taeil now spent his evenings alone and jealous.


End file.
